Friday, January 18, 2008

happy, happy

Squees of general agreeable happiness. And hugs to pansarknitting, and Lorena, and Lucia, and Suzanne (see you tomorrow!) - yup yup yup, relief and all kinds of good stuff. School wise and personal wise. So it's all good.

Also I have gotten halfway through Medium level on Guitar Hero. Stuck at the moment because it looks like I've damaged my disk so that when I'm about to totally kill Slash in the guitar battle, the system freezes up. Phooey. There's a scratch on the disk, I can see it, I'm sure I've screwed something up; just going to have to bite the bullet and replace the disk, I guess.

I got my final paper back from my writing professor this morning, so there is joy in Muddville this day - she loved what I did and is extremely pleased with my work this semester. So I guess I totally rock, dude. It was a kind of weird thing, because there was a snowstorm and we were originally going to have a final class meeting over dinner at an Indian restaurant, but weather dictated cancellation and instead we were to email our final work by midnight. Which I did. Except the fundamental question I discussed in the paper? I had an epiphany at 11:30 and re-wrote and rearranged and flailed about like a ... well, a crazed weasel, actually... and got the paper in just by the skin of my teeth. But that last minute lightening bolt, it was a good 'un. I went from a nice competent piece of writing, to genuinely good work by standards other than academic.

Whee! (yes, this means I got an A.)

Of course now I have very little in the way of articulate words left to say about much of anything. I think I ran out. It would seem I need a bit of a recharge.

On the personal front, the chat(s) referred to cryptically last time have taken place and all seems to be well. Very well. I got together with some knitters I see far too seldom Wed. morning, and went out to the movies with a large gang on Wed. night (happy birthday again, witchypoo!) and yakked everyone's ear off to the point where I'm feeling a little redundant talking about it any more. But I do have a date tonight, and that is pretty neat. And some other logistical things working their way around to see the logistically difficult but wonderful other guy.

Grief group was weird last night. I'm all, gosh I'm feeling great! There's these two guys and it's interesting and fun and and boy I never thought I'd be this happy again! and here's how these other three men friends have helped me emotionally navigate my way through the past year! it's been weird! but it's been really good! Sitting there gushing about that and how my emotional healing has progressed was probably really not that much fun for the new woman in the group who is still in the initial shock of her grief. And the others were a little taken aback, too. I dunno - I felt like I needed to talk about recovering a sexual self, and boy, was that the wrong topic. I sort of thought maybe bad idea, but also thought, hey maybe it'd be good to share that it doesn't stay painful forever. It was okay, yeah, maybe next time, not so much.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok I think you got everything you need out of the grief group... time to move on.

4:37 PM  
Blogger Jena the yarn harpy said...

Maybe this particular group isn't the right one anymore? Particularly if you feel like you need to hold back in sharing your healing.

6:55 PM  
Blogger Lucia said...

What they said. And would someone please fill me in on all the stuff I missed? Dratted Mastersingers.

6:34 PM  

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